What I Did For Cheese
by psychology nerd
Summary: One night, Plagg runs out of camenbart, but when Adrien refuses to buy more until morning, Plagg takes matters into his own paws. Where will his quest to finding his beloved cheese take him? Plagg's pov. Oneshot.


I want to start by saying I don't know what possessed me to write this ridiculously cheesy story. In my longer story, I had to make Plagg disappear for a bit and I really miss him, so I came up with this. I hope you enjoy :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Miraculous. You should be relieved by that. Also, I don't own the song "What I Did For Love", which is older than I am.

* * *

What I Did For Cheese

Plopping another piece of cheese into my mouth, I turned to Adrien as he came out of the bathroom.

"I need more cheese. We're all out."

Adrien groaned. "We'll get more tomorrow. You've had enough for tonight."

I zipped to his side as he climbed into bed. "What? No! Adrien, I'm still hungry."

"How many have you had since we got home?"

"Only five . . . Maybe ten . . . Does it matter? I need cheese!"

"You're not going to starve." He turned away from me, but I just flew to his other side.

"But, Adrien, I love cheese. It's not just for eating."

His eyes narrowed. "Plagg . . . "

"You love Ladybug, but you don't try to eat her . . . You just like it when she's close, right?"

"I hardly think my love for Ladybug is anything close to your cheese obsession."

"You're right. It's not. Your love for Ladybug is nothing like my love for cheese. I love cheese more than you could ever love Ladybug. I can't sleep if she's not close to me."

Adrien sighed. "Plagg, it's been a long day. I'm going to sleep. You'll get it in the morning."

"But, Adrien!"

He closed his eyes. I would not be defeated so easily. I would get my beloved, even if I had to do it alone.

Once Adrien was good and asleep, I slipped out through the window into the Paris night. Hardly anyone was out on the streets. I looked around, checking for closed stores. When I found one, I went through the door and flew toward the cheese. Every moment, I could sense my precious getting closer, and when I found her, my face lit up.

"My precious! I finally found you! It's been too long." I grabbed the largest piece I could carry and headed out of the store. No one would miss one piece of camenbart, except for me.

I went out the door, but as soon as I did, my love disappeared.

"No!" I searched the ground, but then I heard a muffled thud from inside the store. I whirled around, finding my angel on the floor.

I pressed myself against the glass. "No! My love, I'll find a way to get you out!"

How could I get that door open? How could I get that door open _and_ rescue my camenbart?

This was a two-person job, but I knew Adrien wouldn't help me. Frankly, I wasn't sure if he would've been right for the job anyway. I needed someone smaller, someone else who could break in without tripping an alarm. Someone like . . .

 _Tikki_.

"Don't worry, precious! I'll be right back!"

Tikki. Where could she be? The only way I could find her is if I found out who Ladybug was, but that was more Adrien's thing. I couldn't really have cared less, until now.

If there was anyone more invested in unmasking Ladybug, it was that weird chick . . . Oh what was her name? Lady WiFi. . . Lady WiFi. . . Alya! Yes, that was it. But, where did she live . . . .

I peaked in windows until I found either Tikki or Alya, knowing if I found Tikki first, I wouldn't need Alya. As luck wouldn't have it though, I came across Alya first. She was in bed sleeping, at least.

Her desk was surrounded in photos and articles about Ladybug and Cat Noir. I thought about taking an image of Ladybug and comparing her to every girl I came across, but what happened to my cheese would happen to the image as soon as I tried to get out the window. Unless . . .

I pushed up on the window, holding the picture between my teeth. It was a struggle, but the more I thought about my beautiful angel waiting for me at the convenience store, the more strength I managed to put into it, until finally it opened, just enough for me to shove the photo through the crack.

"Mmm. . . Not now, Nino."

I froze. Was she waking up?

". . . I gotta get an interview with Ladybug . . . "

Not wanting to risk it, I zipped out the window, diving for the picture before it could hit the ground. I stared at the image, trying to figure out who else had physical qualities similar to hers. She seemed young, like she could be around Adrien's age, and, remembering how jealous she was over Vulpina, she could be about as immature as him, too. Even though she ignored Cat Noir's advances, she seemed smitten with Adrien, though so were most girls for whatever reason. I mean, if not for me he wouldn't even know how to flirt. He would've just been a bumbling, stuttering idiot, kind of like . . .

I stared at the image again. Young. Raven hair. Pigtails. Bluebell eyes. Slim figure. Smitten with Adrien.

Adrien really was such an idiot.

I dropped the image, knowing exactly who to look for. When I reached Princess' house, I zipped through her balcony doors, finding her fast asleep. Looking around, I found her walls covered in photos of my charge. I smirked, knowing this was going to be fun.

"Tikki," I called in a whisper. I searched the room, but I couldn't find her. Staring at Adrien's princess, I took a deep breath. Desperate times called for desperate measures.

I dove under the blanket, careful not to touch her. Sure enough, I found Tikki attached to her shirt, sleeping peacefully.

I shook her awake. She opened her eyes, giving me a confused look. "Plagg?"

"Shh. You don't want her to wake up, do you?"

We zipped out of the blanket and headed to the balcony.

"What's wrong? Is your charge okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. Never better. Me, on the other hand, I have a life or death situation."

"Over the years, I've come to realize your idea of life or death differs from mine."

"I'm serious this time. The love of my life is trapped and I can't free her by myself."

She sighed. "Cheese again?"

"Please, Tikki! I need you now more than I ever needed you before."

She shook her head. "No way are you dragging me into this."

"Please, Tikki. You don't understand. You love cookies, but Marinette has a whole bakery you can go to anytime. I don't have that luxury. My charge doesn't own a cheese factory, and even though he can afford it, he refuses to buy me one. Please, have a heart."

"Plagg, go home to your charge. You know we shouldn't leave them."

I crossed my arms. "I didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice. Either you help me rescue my precious camenbart, or I'll tell my charge who Ladybug is."

Tikki glared at me. "Plagg, you know that's dangerous."

I nodded. "Yeah, and I also know you would never let me do that. So, you're coming, right?"

Tikki groaned. "Which way?"

We headed back to the store, where I found my precious still on the ground in front of the door, teasing me with her cheesy goodness. I could practically smell her through the door.

"So, we go in, and one of us finds a battering ram while the other-me- gets my love out of this prison."

Tikki crossed her arms. "No. This is for you. You hold the door while I get your cheese out."

"Why do I always have to do the hard work?"

"Do you want my help or not?"

I groaned. "Fine."

We went into the store, and we tried to find something to use on the door.

"We could break the glass," I suggested.

"Bad idea," she said. "It's bad enough that you're stealing."

"The door opens outward," I said. "I can unlock it, and I'll just have to see how heavy the door is."

I zipped into the lock and fiddled with it until I heard a click. As I was about to come out, the door opened.

"Huh. Weird. It's unlocked," a young, masculine voice said. "Must be my lucky day."

When the door closed, I locked it again and zipped out, finding Tikki hiding on a nearby shelf. There were two guys who were dressed in black and wore ski masks. Ski masks always meant trouble.

Tikki and I watched in silence as one went to the register while the other watched the door. As the one guy played with the register, the other looked around, until his eyes landed on my love. For a moment, my heart stopped as he leaned down and picked her up.

"Huh. Someone left cheese on the floor. Were they hoping to catch mice?"

I was about to lunge for him, but Tikki grabbed me. I fought out of her grip, watching in horror as he threw her back to the ground.

"How dare you!" I yelled, lunging for the man. He looked to me and tried to grab me, but I was too fast. "All she wanted was to be loved and eaten by me! You have no right to just throw her around! That's not how you treat a lady!"

I zipped around the guy's head. "What the hell are you?"

By this point, I attracted the other guy's attention, and they both tried to grab at me, but I was too smart and too fast for them. Then, I noticed a red blur go past me, and I smirked. Tikki was joining the party.

"Let's get out," the one who threw my love said. He tried to open the door. "Locked? It was unlocked when we came in!"

"Ha ha, you're stuck!" I floated past his face, and he made another feeble attempt to grab me, and instead he fell into the door.

I turned to Tikki, who was doing a good job dealing with the other guy. "Plagg, if we get them dizzy enough, they'll pass out or something."

My guy was coming at me again. "Or if we catch you, we'll sell you and make a fortune."

I flew to Tikki's side, and we found ourselves standing in between the two idiots. And like the idiots they were, when we flew into the air, they ran into each other and crashed to the floor, groaning and grasping their heads.

Tikki grabbed my paw. "While they're down, let's keep them down. We need to make sure they don't remember us."

We zipped through the shelves, knocking things over onto the men as they tried to get up. Cans, boxes, anything we could. While the men groaned, Tikki turned to me, "Let's just leave, Plagg."

"But, my love . . . She calls to me."

"Fine. Hide, eat it now, and get out. I'm leaving now. You're on your own."

Picking up my beautiful camembert, I stared at her longingly as the men attempted to get up. Taking her into another aisle, I hid behind some juice. "I'm afraid there's not much time, milady, but in a moment we will soon become one. I love you."

Taking one last look at her, I popped her into my mouth. I was going to sleep with her tonight and eat her for breakfast, but I was hungry now and didn't have time to open the door. She was delicious, though. Beautiful and delicious. "Now we're together forever, my love."

I didn't waste another second leaving the store and headed back to the mansion. The dark was beginning to lift, indicating it was almost morning. Adrien would be up soon, and then he would buy me more cheese. Ah camenbart . . . I couldn't wait to taste her cheesy goodness once again.

Shortly after my return, Adrien woke up. I didn't bother with sleep, knowing, as long as there were no akuma attacks, I could sleep while Adrien was in class.

"Adrien! I need cheese."

Groaning, he rubbed his eyes. "Good morning to you, too."

"Adrien, you said you'd get more cheese!"

He sighed, checking his alarm. Five fifty-nine blared in big, red font.

"Fine. If you're not starving enough, claws out."

* * *

Cat Noir jumped across the rooftops of Paris, heading toward the nearest convenience store. When he arrived, however, he found the store blocked off by police, who were leading two men out in handcuffs.

"I'm telling you we're victims!" The one man said. "This crazy store owner has crazy flying attack cats! All I did was throw a piece of cheese and they went crazy and attacked us! They made the mess! We're innocent!"

"Plagg, claws in."

The transformation faded. Adrien stared at Plagg, who was watching the scene below.

"Care to explain?"

Plagg floated out of his reach, and then he sang, "We did what we had to do. Won't forget, can't regret what I did for cheese!"

* * *

Thanks for reading! I hope this wasn't too awful and no one questions my sanity.


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